Last Monday I started having this itchy throat. Oh, I am starting to come down with something. First thing I did was eliminate sugar from my food and I started drinking my veggie juices in a bigger abundance. As the days past I still had this raw, burning throat. It wasn’t a big nuisance but it was just annoying me. The week went on this way and I begin to think that it will clear up in a few more days as long as I eat more clean food.
Then this past Friday, March 11th, I did not want to remove myself from bed. It was like I was glued to the mattress. I had to get up because I had a list of clients to see at the spa. So, I throw back the covers and I headed to the bathroom.
As soon as I turned on the bathroom light I felt strange. It took a few minutes to figure out that I was still half asleep but I felt this wave of emotion come over me. The next thing I knew I was crying. Why? Why am I crying? I did not know the reason and I knew I had to calm down so I could get ready for work.
After this first release I thought okay I can go start my day but then another wave hit me and then another. Okay, I am not going to be able to go to the studio today. I was about to call my first gal and tell her I needed to reschedule when something stopped me from picking up the phone.
I managed to make it to the studio with a calmer mind set. My heart was feeling heavy and I still did not know the reason. For those that know me personally you know it takes a lot for me to cry. I have been working on opening myself up more when it comes to the physical shedding of tears but it has been a hard journey. Please do not get the impression that I do not feel. I do express deep connection to others and the World. It is just that I have blocks when it comes to tears.
So, now I am waiting on my first lady and I am so happy to see her. She has a lot to talk about and I listen. Seems she is having a rough week and as I listen I realize I didn’t pick up the phone to reschedule with her is because cosmically I knew she needed me here today. Then I understood I needed her too.
Later I was feeling light and I felt that the crying was powerfully cleansing. Crying is cleansing and I really should do more of it. And you know what? I woke up Saturday morning and the sore throat was gone. Guess I needed to release the sadness that was welling up in me since Jacob left on Monday. It just didn’t dawn on me that I needed to cry out the sadness. I really feel better now. 🙂